So There Are Going To Be a Few Changes Around Here

DSC013031 So There Are Going To Be a Few Changes Around Here
I’m majorly overwhelmed and thankful for the response to my post on Friday about getting fired. I have to say I was really nervous to expose myself like that, and I asked my husband, who is really good at tough love editing, to read the post twice before I clicked the publish button. In this case he had only positive things to say, so I went for it and I can’t even tell you how glad I am that I did. In addition to the 94 (!) comments on Facebook and 20 comments on the post itself, I also received private messages from friends who had been fired or gone through other experiences that shook their self esteem, thanking me for the post. It seems to have made a lot of people feel less shitty about getting fired.

DSC01305 So There Are Going To Be a Few Changes Around Here
So I’m going to take that honesty ball and run with it. I’ll be posting here daily, and I’ll do my best not to make things seem shinier or happier than they really are. For example, I’m telling you right now that while Frida was just reaching the top of that ladder (see above), I looked away for one second and she FELL probably 6 feet or so and it was terrifying. The husband was nearby and he came running over and I felt totally guilty for being the bad parent who let her fall.
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So I Got Fired Yesterday

Yep, I got canned. It’s kind of the worst feeling, and it’s embarrassing, and my first instinct was to not let anyone ever know this really humiliating thing happened to me. In fact, I fibbed to one of my closest friends yesterday when I told her I couldn’t make it to the girl’s night out we’d planned because I’d “quit” my job and was upset about it (really sorry, Shadin).

Then I talked to my husband, who also got fired last year. He decided then not to take his employer’s offer to say it was a mutual agreement, not really a firing. I asked him why he would not take that opportunity to save face, and he said because it’s liberating to tell the truth. The job wasn’t right for him, and he got fired, why sugarcoat it? That got me thinking about my own hesitation to admit the truth of my shitcanning.

Then we picked up our daughter from daycare. As I waited for her caretaker to open the door, I was overwhelmed by the feeling that what’s on the other side of that door is what’s most important. Then it opened, and she gave me that smile and ran to me like I was the the most awesome person on earth.

I see quotes about how failure is good and necessary all over social media every day.

Here’s a great one from Maya Angelou:

“Courage allows the successful woman to fail-
and learn powerful lessons-
from the failure-
so that in the end,
she didn’t fail at all.”

Various outlets publish tons of lists of quotes on failure every year—but hardly anyone talks about their actual failures (Here’s one exception).

While reading the quotes makes me feel not as terrible, facing what’s real feels even less terrible. I want to live up to that awesome-person status, which would seem to require being an honest person. I got fired yesterday, y’all. I did some good writing at that job and I’m proud of my work. In the end it wasn’t enough, and it’s time to move on. So here’s to what’s next… omg what is next? I’ll try to figure that out over the weekend. Check back Monday, won’t you?

#TBT Fun at Mira Mira, Then and Now (Ladies Night Is Tonight!)

stylenik undone done 63 #TBT Fun at Mira Mira, Then and Now (Ladies Night Is Tonight!)
Photo by Molly DeCoudreaux

Almost exactly two years ago, I asked my friend Mira Pickett, who owns the boutique Mira Mira in the Mission, to style me for a photo shoot for this blog. The concept was “undone done,” a way of dressing the two of us had bonded on when we first met. Since it’s Thursday (#TBT!) I figured it was a propos to dig up one of those photos. As you can tell, we had a blast!

I’m so excited that two years later we’re even better friends, and that TONIGHT we’re collaborating again, this time on a Ladies Night event at the shop with eyewear startup Brownie and Madam. Get a personal styling session from a Brownie and Madam stylist, plus 10 percent off if you order glasses. You’ll also get 15 percent off everything at Mira Mira during the party.
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Baby’s First Kurta

New Folder With Items1 Babys First Kurta
Photos by Kourosh Karimkhany

This is Frida’s first Modi Kurta (actually it’s by Gypsy Kids, scored at Zulily). I love her in boyish colors and styles accented by something super girly, like this very pink bow and sparkly sandals. I picked this outfit based on the pants, which were handed down by my most eco-conscious and super-stylish friend Amy. They are little fold-over stretchy harem pants! We went to Amy’s 6-year-old son’s birthday party on Saturday, which had a snake theme, complete with real snakes to “pet!”

I wore my applique maxi from ASOS (similar here) with my trusty low-top Converse Chuck Taylors and this T by Alexander Wang shirt scored at Nordstrom Rack (similar here). By the way, are you guys stoked for the A. Wang x H&M collab? Personally I’m getting burnt out on collabs. No more polyester/polymide versions of high end pieces, please! But if he uses natural fabrics I might be more enthusiastic.
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Stripes and High Tops

IMG 7309 Stripes and High Tops
Photos by Kourosh Karimkhany

We took a detour from our regular Pacifica haunts this weekend and found this sandy area, where a bunch of hang gliders were hovering around. Frida is learning approximately 100 words per day, some of which we can understand. “Daddy” is still her favorite, I try not to take it personally!

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La-Dee-Dah

long skirt 1 La Dee Dah
Photos by Kourosh Karimkhany

Frida finally said her own name! Well, kind of. She says Dee-dah. It’s pretty darn cute.

Here are a few scenes from our weekend, which I’m really sad is over. We really do need a day in between Saturday and Sunday, don’t you think? By the way, I haven’t posted in a week because I’ve been OBSESSED with redesigning my blog. Hope you like it!
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Work in Progress

IMG 5849 Work in Progress

Some bloggers, writers, designers (fill in creative-type person here) have a strong voice and solid point of view at a young age. Take Man Repeller, for example. She was in her ’20s when her blog, with it’s great photos and confident, hilarious writing, became huge. Or Alexandar Wang. He was a youngster when he saw major success as a designer. But for the majority of us, it takes a little longer.
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Changing Scenery

IMG 7124 Changing Scenery

We’ve hosted people for brunch for the past two weekends in a row, and each time it was a challenge to find the perfect thing to wear. You need to be comfy when you’re hosting, especially when you’re wrangling a toddler while trying to pour mimosas. I always default to some massive muu-muu type thing, but that always backfires because fabric gets in the way.

This jungle-print skirt from Topshop paired with a relaxed tee worked out perfectly. The skirt is stretchy and just long enough that even with the wrangling I never risked a too-revealing situation. And you can’t go wrong with a cotton tee—I tend to get warm while entertaining guests so I was thankful for the short sleeves. And the little missy, well, she always seems to know just the thing to wear.
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Setting Sail

IMG 7074 Setting Sail

I’m not 100% poser. I’ve tried sailing. I took a series of sailing classes with my husband a few years ago. We learned to tie useful knots and how to tack and this and that and other terms I don’t remember. My biggest fear upon enrolling was tipping over. My husband said, “There is no way these dinghies can capsize. They are extremely hard to tip over, even if you tried.” Guess what our assignment was for class #2? Yes, purposely CAPSIZE, turtle it (yes that’s a thing) then jump in the damn Bay and pull it back upright. That was my last foray into the kind of sailing that does’t involve a glass of champagne.

I love a nautical look though! You can’t see it but a sailboat festoons the front of this sweater, scored at Goodwill. You obviously don’t need to go anywhere near a boat to don a sailor-y outfit. Thank goodness.

Sweater: Goodwill, similar here (on sale!); jeans: H&M, similar here; boots, Topshop, similar here; crocheted earrings, ancient, similar here; bag: Rebecca Minkoff, similar here. Frida is head to toe Gymboree icon smile Setting Sail

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